1. Drunk girls can always find Twinkies.
  2. Iranian comedians on BBC are funny when they say “suck my titties.”
  3. Women using the men’s bathroom at Lahaina’s will get thrown out the bar.
  4. Mullet wigs are hot.
  5. Meeting new people is easier when shots are involved.
  6. Cops have a wicked sense of humor.
  7. Sunscreen is a good thing.
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